Sports Silliness

The last few days have provided some funny sports stuff.  Let us take a look at a few of them.

Haha, very classy Rice!  Probably the only thing I will remember about them all season.

World-class athlete...running is hard!



Seriously, what the hell is Morgan thinking?  Does he really want a piece of Pujols?  That man would destroy him.  Also, I would love to see Fielder and Pujols fight.  Plus, if Morgan was so serious about fighting, how is it that Prince Fielder is able to lightly jog run full speed over to grab Morgan?  That was one of those:  "oh shit, I hope someone grabs before I get my ass beat."

And then Morgan decides to go to twitter...

Calling Albert Pujols a woman...wow.  Very clever Nyjer!  I also see that spelling is kicking your ass, especially "where vs. we're."  What a joke...



Things I learned from the Sidney Crosby press conference:
-His brain is like a Ferrari
-The etymology of the word concussion...it comes from Latin!
-Christmas is a celebration
-90% is better than 89%
-Sid needs to buy polo shirts a size bigger...he looked like he was about to explode out of that and start screaming "SID ANGRY!!! SID SMASH!!"
-According to the ladies, Sid is still sexy.
-Vestibular perception
-Sid is not retiring.  Or at least, do not bet on that.

Wow, just wow...these uniforms look like something you would see in Grant Morrison's Invisible.

Fantasy Football Preview

This year I am in two leagues:  Kevin's league that I was in last and one with a bunch of Pittsburgh fans via twitter.  We shall now take a look at how my teams look. 

Ngewo's Crappy Team
In Kevin's league, I was able to attend the draft because a certain hurricane caused the date to change and instead of being an in-person draft, we just did it online.  Here are my results:

I like this team.  I took a chance on Jones and if he can perform well, I could honestly see some big things from him come mid-season.

I took Antonio Brown very late because I figured, what the heck.  Might as well get him now before someone scarfs him up if he starts putting up big numbers.

I think my biggest problem will be deciding who to start in my flex position each week.  Do I go with Best or Jones? 

Another tough decision is which QB to start.  I guess that is a good thing though.

Their are only eight teams in this league, so it is hard to tell if my team is really good, or if everyone's team is really good.  If that makes sense...

I am a little annoyed that Ryan did not get in the league this year, since he was the one who got me involved.  We had some fun last year with trades and playoff games...well Ryan, if you want to offer advice, feel free.

FinishingInTheRear
This league is a little different:  14 teams, more position players:  3 WR/3 RB/and the flex position includes TE, also there is a defensive player as well.

Unfortunately, since it was decided pretty late to do this league, the draft was set for today and the only time available was 2:00, so I had to let Yahoo auto-draft.  I did a little adjusting to the pre-rankings, but I did not notice the defensive player, so I have no clue how this will turn out.

Auto-draft looks to have done a fairly good job.  I realized when I got to work that when I bumped defenses up in the pre-rankings that I may have pushed them way too high.  I was almost hoping that I would end up with Green Bay and Pittsburgh.  Figured that would be good trade bait.

My WRs look a little week, and I could be in trouble if Stafford gets hurt pretty early on.  I might have to look into making a trade with one of my RBs.

I also could probably upgrade on the defensive player, but I will need to look to see how the scoring works.  When Amanda (the commissioner of the league) tweeted me my roster, it said B. McCann.  My first thought was:  huh, they really did make it a combined baseball/football fantasy league.  I was happy with McCann as my catcher...

On a side-note (I am very hyphen happy tonight), I want someone to invent a year long fantasy sports league that allows you to draft players from all sports.  And I have the perfect day to hold the draft:  the day after the baseball all-star game.  No sports games that day!  You allow the season to run until the next ASG...it would be awesome...

Anyways, let me know what you think of my teams, what could I improve?  Also, I will try to update my weeks just like I do for baseball, but that will have to happen on Tuesday.

Fantasy Baseball Week 22

The final regular week of the season.  Unfortunately, I was winning 12-0 all week, then on Saturday some of my pitchers sucked and Shellie's pitchers decided to take advantage.  She took over ERA on Saturday, and then on Sunday, some asshole named Jeremy Hellickson decided to throw a complete game shutout.  That dropped the final score to 9-2.  I went from sixth place to fifth place, but had I not tied the win category, I would have jumped to third and if I went 12-0, I am pretty sure I would have been in second place.

Congratulations to Ryan for getting the first seed and pretty much dominating all season.  Good luck to everyone in the playoffs.  This week I take on James, who finished in fourth place.  I tied him the first time and beat him 9-3 last time.  Good luck my friend!

My best player this week was Dustin Ackley, he hit .429/.480, had a HR and a SB.  He also racked up six RBIs and three Runs.  Great week for the rookie.

Comic Book Characters Should Play Baseball: DC Edition

The other day I was thinking about comic book characters and how silly it is that all of these characters become heroes/villains when they realize they have some kind of power or ability.  If I found out that I had enhanced strength or something, I would probably go into professional sports.  Much easier to make millions.

I started to wonder which comic book characters would make the best baseball players.  I decided to only use the humans who had minor enhancements.  Obviously Superman would destroy a baseball.  And yes, the Flash would just tap the ball and make it home in under a second.  People would probably notice they were a little different.

Shortstop
Remember the days before Alex Rodriguez played for the Yankees?  Or before he took performance enhancing drugs?  He was a big guy, who could hit and play his position.  He was quick, agile, and powerful.  Who does that sound like?

Batman is 6'2, 210 lbs. and is a master in multiple forms of martial arts.  He would be amazing in the field.  Throwing batarangs probably means he would be pretty accurate throwing to first from awkward positions.  Oh, and he is big and strong, and could probably be a 40 HR type guy.

Second Base
You need someone quick at second, who can help turn those tricky double plays.  Well if Batman is at SS, then you would definitely want Robin at second.  Obviously I mean Tim Drake.  He was my favorite Robin.  Tim is listed at only 5'1, 115 lbs, but I think he may have grown a little bit.  Anyways, he would have the quickness to make those turns and throws to first.

Also, since he loves to use his bo staff, he would probably be a great slap hitter.  I could imagine him being more like Ichiro, high average and a ton of stolen bases.

Third Base
This is one of the positions where you want some serious power.  This is the character that got me thinking about this whole post.  Slade Wilson, aka Deathstroke.  He has enhanced abilities:  strength, agility, reflexes, and a healing factor.

This guy is a mercenary, but he could easily make a crap-load of money hitting 50 HRs per year and also hitting around .400.  If Albert Pujols or A-Rod can get over $200 million (I am sure Pujols will get that kind of money), Slade would probably be even higher paid.  Plus, his extra abilities would not be noticeable as long as he did not jump twenty feet into the air or something.

Oh, and with that healing factor, he could probably break Cal Ripken's consecutive game streak.

First Base
This is another one of those big, power-hitter type positions.  You would someone who is a big target for the other infielders to throw too, but also someone who can just crush a baseball.

Bane would make a great first baseman.  He is 6'8 and as long as he does not overdo it on the Venom, he would not look a muscle-bound freak.  Just use it on occasion and keep belting out HRs, probably would strikeout a few times though.  He would be like Adam Dunn.

Luckily, as of now, MLB does not test for Venom.  If they did, Bane could be banned for a few games.  Although, he has stopped using it in comics, to get started in baseball, while growing up in the Caribbean, I am sure he would have been juicing. 

Center Field
When you think of a center fielder, you want someone who is a natural athlete, and very fast.  They usually have a lot of ground to cover.  Well, who better than Nightwing?  He is built almost exactly like Andrew McCutchen.

Dick Grayson was a fantastic gymnast and acrobat long before he met Batman.  That kind of thing probably would come in handy when making ridiculous catches.  Also, he probably has a cannon from throwing batarangs and whatnot.  I picture him as .300 hitter, who steals about 30-50 bases per year.  Not a huge HR guy, maybe 15 to 20, but probably a fantastic gap hitter.

Left Field
Here is another one that has super powers, but those could easily be hidden.  Animal Man could play left field.  He could summon the speed and power of any animal he wanted.  As long as he does not overdo it, he could become one of the greats out there.

I picture him putting up numbers similar to CarGo last year.  35-40 HRs, 40-50 SBs, an average around .350.  Yeah, people would probably remember Buddy Baker as a player more than they remember him as a superhero.

Right Field
You want an amazing athlete out there who can throw the ball to third base and home on a rope.  Who would be better than Mr. Terrific?  The dude has won the Olympic gold medal in the decathlon and has multiple black-belts.

I bet he would put up a .300 average, hit about 25-35 HRs, and probably gun down about 15 guys a year trying to tag up on him.  The guy just seems to excel at whatever he does.

Catcher
This is such a tough position because most people do not realize how difficult it can be.  Also, there are so many different types of catcher.  Personally, I look for a good defensive catcher.  The abilities you want in that kind of catcher are quick reflexes.  People forget that a catcher has about the same amount of time to react to a pitch as the hitter.  If his pitcher misses his target, there is not a lot of time to move the body to make the catch.

Captain Boomerang Jr (Owen Mercer) would be perfect.  He is an expert at throwing objects, so he could probably throw out a good amount of runners, plus he has a little bit of super-speed, which means he can probably use that to slow down the rest of the world.  A runner stealing second would not distract him as the pitch is coming in.  Plus, he could use a little bit of that speed to allow him to steal bases.  I could see him racking up somewhere around 60-100 SBs in a season, probably have a huge OBP with all of his walks since he can slow the world down and know if a pitch is a ball or strike. 

Pitchers
If you want a good starting staff, you might as well look no further than the Green Arrow and his family.  Ollie, Roy, and Connor are all expert marksmen.  Using a bow makes a person have a very strong arms and chest.  They could easily become a pitcher with that kind of skill-set.  You might as well add Merlyn to that mix as well.  Instead of becoming an assassin, why not make millions throwing a baseball?

 And what about a late inning reliever?  How about Hourman?  The dude could just pop one of his Miraclo pills and be a hard throwing closer for about an hour.  He could be a two inning closer as long as it does not take more than an hour.

Alright, well that is it for this installment.  Next time I will look at some Marvel characters.

Fantasy Baseball Week 21

I definitely owe Jason a few dozen cookies!  Okay, not like he actually benched everyone, but he could have been a dick and started paying attention this week.  I beat him 7-3, which is great, but there is even better news:  I am now in sixth place!!!

I decided to pick up John Danks and he was a very pleasant surprise.  A win and 10 Ks.  I will take it all day long.  Verlander picked up two wins this week, but Sabathia did not have one.  I tied that category, ugh.

My best hitter was Ortiz, the dude was a beast this week.  Ryan Braun also had another huge week, with four stolen bases.  Unfortunately, he did most of his good work against the Pirates, so he deserves this picture:

Picture via the always awesome Rumbunter...

Fantasy Baseball Week 20

Fuck!  I was winning all week long!  Sorry about the vulgarity, but it is the only way I can express how angry I am after this week.  When I left on Saturday morning for a weekend trip, I was up 7-3.  I came home Sunday night and had lost to Dave, 6-5.  What the hell happened?

Well the first thing I can mention, is that I did not start Jon Lester on Monday.  I came home from work and assumed that he would be on a night game, but no!  He was playing at noon or something ridiculous.  We tied in strikeouts, Lester had at least one that game.  Also, his ERA and WHIP would have driven mine down, although I do not think enough to actually win.

I have two weeks left to go from 8th place to 6th place.  This is actually doable, since 1.0 game behind the sixth place person.  This week I take on Jason/Nick (who is probably not paying attention anymore or if the should at least not start anyone and allow me to sweep them...please.)

Tough to decide who my superstar was, probably because I am so irritated.  I would have to say Ryan Zimmerman, but one could argue for Derek Jeter or Ryan Braun.  Drew Stubbs still eats cock.

College is Overrated

The Pirates signed their second round pick, Josh Bell.  There seemed to be a debate about whether or not he would sign since he sent out a letter asking teams not to draft him because he wanted to go to college and play for the University of Texas.

Most people thought this was a ploy to get a team to offer him more money.  And it obviously worked, but the thing that cracked me up, was the number of people saying that they could understand why he would want to go to college.

This is something I read somewhere "he may want to go to college to get his degree in case baseball does not work out."  Umm, yeah, that is all well and good, or he could take that huge signing bonus he received and tuck about $100,000 away in case he gets hurt and wants to go to school.  That should cover it.

I could understand if he was deciding to go to college because he was not considered a huge prospect, but he would have probably been a top fifteen pick if he had not scared everyone away with that letter.  Yes, he could go to college and do very well and end up being a top five pick, but what if he gets hurt, ends his career?  Or because of injury, gets drafted in the eighth round.

It reminds me of those college football players who stick around for their senior year, yet they are already considered a top draft pick (I am looking at you Peyton Manning).  I wanted Manning to get hurt so bad and end up never making it to the NFL.  Oddly though, now I actually like Peyton Manning.  That is a different story though.

What other things would there be that Josh Bell would miss out on?  The college experience?  Banging a bunch of college girls?  Look, I am sure with his huge stash of cash, he will be able to stay up late and sleep with some hot girls.  Hell, he can swing by any campus and probably pick up a few girls.  Hey Josh, anytime you want to go out at PSU, let me know, I'll show ya the hot spots!

Hell, this is good advice to any young person who has no clue what they want to do with their life.  If they only want to go to college in order to party, here is my suggestion:  go to a huge college and become a bartender.  Seriously, move to PSU/UT/OSU...wherever.  Become a bartender, you will have money all the time and you will get to do some serious partying.  Once you get tired of the college town, move to the beach and do it for awhile.  As you are doing this, tuck away a little money in case you decide you want to go to school.  Then, go to a technical school and become a plumber or a HVAC repairman.  Best advice I could ever give anyone!

Fantasy Baseball Week 19

I beat Dan 6-5.  Unfortunately, it dropped me to 8th place in the league.  Still pretty close to jumping up in the standings though.

I won the pitching categories minus WHIP and the only hitting category I won was OBP.  My team was actually pretty good hitting-wise.  We tied with eight HRs and my team did hit .278 for the week.

My pitching was okay, nothing great.  I really do not even have a player that I want to mention as my superstar this week.  I guess I will go with Josh Tomlin, he had a win and a 1.42 ERA with a nice .79 WHIP.

This week I take on Dave, and I seriously need a victory.  A big one...

Fantasy Baseball Week 18

Another win!  I beat Pat 6-4, bringing my record back over .500.  I am now in seventh place and could jump into sixth with another week or so.  I won the following categories:  runs, average, OBP, holds, ERA, and WHIP.  We tied stolen bases and strikeouts, which is just annoying.  You mean one of my pitchers could not get one more K?

My pitchers were not spectacular this week.  I only mustered two wins.  I also only picked up four saves (three of which were from Drew Storen).  My hitters were okay, but no one really had a mind blowing week.  Ryan Zimmerman scored three runs, had five RBIs, and hit for .429/.500 over the week.  Not too shabby.

Enjoy my photoshopping skills...

I want to point out how much I hate Drew Stubbs.  The days I started him, he would end up being hitless and pretty much useless.  I benched him on Sunday and he hit a homer and stole a base.  Ugh, that has been how he has been all season.  A complete cock-muncher.

This week I take on Dan, who is in dead last.  I should beat him and if I can give him a good beat down, hopefully I will be in sixth place.

Cubs Game

The Place That Shall Not Be Named gave me and a coworker tickets because we are part of a peer-advising program (I am the adviser).  I was a little bummed because I figured they would have us in the luxury box, but instead we sat up in section 316.  As you can see, the seats were good, there are no bad seats at PNC Park.

Not much to say though, the Pirates lost even though newly acquired Derek Lee hit two home runs.

We went to Rivers Casino before the game and I played three-card poker again.  I won the first two hands and immediately thought "oh boy, here we go."  Then, they switched dealers, every time they switch dealers on me, I end up going on a losing streak.  I should just leave the table.  After that I lost every single hand and I had decent hands.  If I had a K73, the dealer would have a K84.  The dealer was even making comments about it.  Oh well, you win some, you lose some.  I dropped my $100 in about ten minutes, not very cool.  Hell, I was broke before my beer arrived, haha.

It was a fun time though, drank some beer, saw some baseball, ate some food, and fed my gambling addiction.  I cannot complain.

Fantasy Baseball Week Seventeen

This was an intense week.  Every time I would check the match-up at work it would flip-flop.  I would be up 6-5, then down 7-4.  It was pretty nerve racking.  I ended the week in a strong way though, cementing a victory over Offord 7-3.  The most impressive thing was coming back to win runs on Sunday.  My team scored nine runs to take the category.  I also won RBIs, AVE, OBP, Ks, Holds, and WHIP.

Allow me to bitch and complain for a second.  I use Fantasy Guru on my phone and I have not had any problems with it before.  Saturday night, I set my team for Sunday including Justin Verlander.  For some reason the stupid thing did not take the change and I had him on the bench.  He had a win, 9 Ks, and 0 earned runs over eight innings!  We tied in the wins category!  I do not feel like doing the math to see if it would much it would have dropped my team ERA.

My big player was definitely Ryan Roberts, granted a bunch of guys on my team had great weeks, but Roberts has been slumping and it was nice to get any kind of production out of my second base position.  He hit .389/.500, 4 Runs, 2 HRs, 3 RBIs.

My pitching was good again, minus Charlie Morton deciding to completely ruin the hard work of Sabathia, Lester, and Verlander (his first start anyway).  Ryan offered me a trade for Jon Lester, I think it was Carlos Pena and Heyward.  I turned it down, at the moment my team is firing on all cylinders.  I do not see a reason to mess with anything, unless a great trade would come along.

My record is now 96-97-11 and I am still in 8th place.  Another win this week and I could quickly be in sixth and then from there, who knows...

Links and Videos and Stuff

I have nothing to write about...well nothing that has not been said by better folks than me.  So whatever.

The Pirates
As everyone knows by now, the Buccos lost in a crazy game where the umpire blew the call.  If you checked all the blogs in my links section, they all had something to say about it.  None of them say it nearly as well as WHYGAVS.  That is just pure emotion...

Comic-Con
I was pretty uninterested in the happenings of SDCC this year.  It is crazy to think that I used to want to go there so bad, yet now I have no real interest in it.  I still love comics, but the idea of going there and watching movie previews seems a little insane.  I think it used to be about comics, now who knows what it is...anyways, read Filmdrunks last photo diary from SDCC, pretty cool.

Noah's Ark


This video is pretty funny, a little long though.  Brought to you by:  XKV8R.

Miss USA
Over at Sean's site, he posted this video, which is a great parody of the actual Miss USA contestants answering the question about should evolution be taught in schools.





Stupidity amazes me.

Fantasy Baseball Week 16

It was the moment you have all been waiting for:  the rematch between Ngewo's World and Sean's Ramblings.  I won the last match-up and needed a big win to keep myself in the playoff hunt.  Needless I gave Sean a smackdown he will not forget!  Okay, that is not true, I beat him 8-4.

He beat me in Wins, Ks, Holds, and SBs.  How weird is that?  The categories I lost were the ones I usually win...Sadly it was a week where Sabathia and Verlander had only won start each.  Normally they would pile up the strikeouts and get me a bunch of wins.  Also, Drew Stubbs usually gets me stolen bases, but I have not been starting him since he is slumping.  Oh well, you cannot win them all I guess, right?

My team hit 11 HRs, and hit .310/.373, pretty awesome.  My pitching was also great with a 2.16 ERA/1.08 WHIP.  Why can't they do this every week?

I had some major hitters this week:  Ryan Braun, Eric Hosmer, Derek Jeter, and Ryan Zimmerman (amazing that I had seven stolen bases, but still lost that category).  My best hitter was Miguel Montero, well that is a toss-up since Braun was pretty awesome too.  Just take a look at these numbers.

I am still in 8th place with a record of 89-94-9, but I am slowly making my way back up to at least sixth place.  I am taking on Offord this week, he is in 2nd place.  Imler is in 7th place, but he is taking on James this week, so you an imagine who I am rooting for...

Monday's Antics

Last week I looked at my schedule and realized that Lindsey and I were both off on Monday.  I decided we should head to Pittsburgh to watch the Buccos take on the Reds.  We left here around 3:00, which was a little later than I would have liked.  I wanted to get there pretty early so we could head to the casino.  Unfortunately, Lindsey got stuck doing errands, which sucked for me since I woke up early, even though I worked third shift the night before and fell asleep around 8:30 a.m.

We got to the stadium around 5:00 and hopped in line for tickets.  I know, can you believe I just typed those words:  a line for tickets...Anyways, I had coupons that I bought from work so our tickets were free.  We then walked over to Finnigan's for some beers and food.

As we sat there eating, it started to pour down rain and then it started thundering.  I checked on twitter and found out that the tarp was being put on the field and the game would be delayed.  We sat there and had a few more beers.

We finally went over to the stadium at about 7:45.  We sat down (our seats were in section 127, pretty good considering they were free).  The game started and things started out poorly.  With the bases loaded and two outs the lightning and rain returned.  At first we were not get wet because we were just under the second level, but then it started raining harder and we decided to get up and walk around.

We adventured around the park for a bit, but then we grew bored of walking and went to grab a beer.  I bought a Penn Pilsner and we stood around waiting for the start of the game.  I was able to get some peanuts off the people beside us, which I think embarrassed Lindsey.  I turned and asked the guy if I could have a peanut, he looked at me like I was nuts (HAHA, pun intended!), but then his wife was like "yeah, you can have some."  I took one because I am not greedy, but then she laid a huge handful on our little table.  When they got up to leave she gave us some more.  I like that lady.

The rain was coming down pretty hard and it really did not look like there was any end in sight.  It slowed down just enough for us to make a decision:  stay and wait it out, or head to the casino.  If we stayed and the game started around 9:30 or 10:00, the game would most likely not be over until 12:30 or 1:00.  We would not get home until 3:00 or 4:00. 

After considering all of that, we decided to leave and go to the casino.  Lindsey met her friend Kristina there and I went over to play three-card poker.  I started with $100 and after losing the first couple of hands, there was a dealer change.  This lady was fantastic!

Actually, she was a terrible dealer.  Twice she misread my hand and was about to short me money, luckily the guy beside me caught it since I was watching the Pirates game on a TV above us.  Then, she paid me out as a winner when I clearly had nothing.  Luckily the guy beside me did not say anything.  Aside from those idiotic things, I was also on a nice hot streak.  At one point I had $400 in chips.  I kept hoping Lindsey would come by and say that she was ready to go.

Granted, I could have quit playing and just walked away, but what fun would there be in that?  Anyways, she never came around and the original dealer came back.  I then hit a major cold streak.  The kind of streak where if you have a pair of kings, the dealer gets a pair of aces.  Ugh.  I had a king/jack/ten once and the dealer flipped a king/queen/ten.  What kinda bullshit is that?  I ended up walking away with the same $100 I started with, which I gave to Lindsey to put towards our vacation.

We left the casino around midnight and guess what?  The game was just ending.  Apparently it started as soon as we left and went fairly fast.  Ugh, how dumb was I?  Granted, I had a lot of fun at the casino, but I would have rather been at the game.  Oh well, live and learn I guess.  Also, my luck if we had stuck around then there would have been another storm and another delay or a postponement. 

The last two pictures made me think of Gotham City and it is pretty obvious why they chose to film the new Batman film in Pittsburgh...

Fantasy Baseball Week 15

I love shortened weeks.  I beat James 9-3.  Sadly, my team actually did alright minus Sunday.  I rocked 20 Runs, 4 HRs, 21 RBIs...hell, normally that would be my total for an entire week.  I would have won batting average, but then Sunday pretty much blew.

Not too much to analyze here.  My best player was probably Mike Stanton.  I have already used him before and I figure I should use someone different.  So this week, I chose Koji Uehara.  He picked up the one hold which won that category for me.

My record is now 81-90-9 and I am in 8th place.  This week I take on Sean, who I beat 6-5 back in week five.  Hopefully I can finish the sweep...

Baseball First Half Results

What can I say?  This has been one helluva season so far.  There are all sorts of things happening around the league, but none of which are all that important because the Pirates are one game out of first place with a 47-43 record!  They are above .500 at the All-Star break!  That is absolutely crazy when you think that at the beginning of the year we were wondering if they would win 70 games.

Anyways, you can find my original prediction's here.

In the NL East, I have the division race pretty much on point except that the Marlins and Nationals are flip-flopped.  I was also right about how much Nationals fans are loving Werth.  Haha, suck it Washington!  My insane prediction was that Mike Stanton would hit 40 HRs, which probably will not happen, but he does have 18 and he missed games with a nagging quad injury.  Also, it took him awhile to really get rolling.  This kid is going to crush balls for a long time.

I completely screwed up the NL Central.  Who would have predicted it this way?  Ryan thought the Cubs would win the division, I think we can all agree that one is probably not going to happen.  My insane pick is actually way off:  the Pirates lost to Greinke and Halladay, but beat Lohse.  They have lost twice to Dillon Gee, but none of those were shutouts.  They have not faced the others yet.

My NL West picks are almost exact if you take out the D-Backs.  Apparently they decided to be pretty good as well.  Hey, Mat Latos started the season hurt and is not having a very good year.  He will probably not win 20 games.

My NL MVP was Troy Tulowitzki.  He is having a good season, but not the best player in the league type season.  Statistically speaking, Matt Kemp and Andrew McCutchen are having the best seasons, if the Pirates win the division or even break their losing streak, I think people will mention Cutch as an MVP candidate.  As of now though, the kind of guy that the writers love to vote for is either Jose Reyes (if he stays healthy all season, and stays in the NL) or Ryan Braun.

My prediction for Rockies players has not helped them at all.  It looks like the Cy Young award is a nice race between the Phillies staff and Jair Jurrjens (you could toss a few other names in there as well).  Honestly though, I think Roy Halladay will end up winning it from this point on.

ROY awards are difficult, they should be split into pitcher/hitter.  Espinosa seems to be the leader in the NL, although, Freddie Freeman is heating up and could possibly pass him.

Over in the AL East, I was almost completely right except for the Red Sox being in first place, fortunately they are only one game above the Yankees.  I was right about the Blue Jays not hitting as many HRs as last year, but what I hinted on was that Jose Bautista would not continue to destroy baseballs...I was way wrong.

Who knew?

I hate the AL Central, seriously.  At least I was right about the White Sox not being in first place.  Unfortunately, I did not picture the Indians and Tigers battling for first place.  This is still a long season, who knows what will happen.

I pretty much nailed it with the Rangers, but Ryan was close with his Angels pick as they are only one game back.  I was completely wrong with the A's though.  Minus the hitting part.

Naturally my picks in the AL awards races are way off.  Jose Bautista is the favorite for MVP and Weaver/Verlander are probably the main Cy Young candidates.  It looks like Mark Trumbo could probably win the ROY.

Anyways, there is still a good amount of baseball left and anything can happen.  Hopefully more of my predictions are right and if they are going to end up wrong, let us just make sure it is the Buccos that completely wreck my division picks.  I would love to have to buy playoff tickets...

Fantasy Baseball Week Fourteen

Oh bloody hell!  I hate you world!  If I would have written this yesterday, I would have said that I beat Ryan 6-5.  Unfortunately, after a stat correction took away a stolen base from Eric Hosmer on Sunday, Ryan ended up winning that category, which means we tied 6-6.  UGH!

Anyways, my team played pretty well.  I finally won batting average and OBP with a .295/.358.  I also won RBIs, Saves, Ks, and ERA.  It was definitely a nice change of pace. 

My best hitter was some guy that collected his 3000th hit.  I would tell you all about his huge week, but most of that was due to his five-hit day against the Rays.  Also, I could tell you that Sabathia was my best pitcher, with two wins and 20 Ks, and 0.00 ERA/.75 WHIP.

Instead though, my player of the week, my big hero was definitely Alex Presley.  He hit .368/.429 and also scored five runs.  Not too bad for a guy just called up because of Tabata's injury.  If there was a category for looking like a 12 year old, Presley would have dominated for me.

Happy Birthday Ryan!

Hey Ryan, hope you had a great birthday...

Last year on your birthday did you think:  "Man, I bet next season the Buccos will be in second on my birthday and will be four games over .500.  In fact, they will be this good without Pedro Alvarez, Ross Ohlendorf, Ryan Doumit, and Chris Snyder.  Karstens, Morton, Maholm, and Correia will be some of the better pitchers in the NL."

If you did think that, I would have liked to smoke whatever it was you were smoking.

Oh, and since the ladies out there complain that I do not show enough pictures of sexy guys, here is one of Ryan and I pretty drunk...

Fantasy Baseball Week Thirteen

The winning streak came to an end, although I guess it was not really much of a winning streak.  Imler beat me 8-3, which pretty much blows since a win would have brought me to almost .500 and the win did bring him over .500.

Both of our teams were bad, this was not an epic battle.  My team had a .241/.311 OBP/AVG and those are the categories I won.  I had 10 SBs, but only 14 Runs, in general that should not happen, right?  Also, I failed to start Jon Lester (he and Sabathia had been starting a day apart and when I saw Sabathia/Verlander starting, I assumed Lester was not going to be pitching that day).  I missed out on a win from Lester, which would have given me one more category, plus the drop in ERA could have given me the lead there as well.  I am too lazy to figure it out.  Also if Brian Wilson did not suck, my ERA/WHIP would have been pretty good.

Speaking of good players, Ryan Braun should have had a great week:  he hit .529/.600, but had no Runs or HRs and only 3 RBIs.  I guess my best player was Mike Moustakas, he scored two runs and had one RBI, with a line of .421/.476.

I am glad that interleague play is over so that David Ortiz can return to the lineup.  He is not much of a pinch hitter and having him on my bench seemed to kill any of my chances for RBIs.  I am still offering any of my pitchers for hitters.  Imler, I do not want another starter, sorry.

A Little About the Future

Hey there!  This is Josh from the future.  Actually from the year 2130.  Seriously, no bullshit.  I know what you are thinking, how the hell can you be from the future?  Well scientists figured out time travel a few years back and they also figured out that you can go as far back as you want.  Do not ask too many questions, do I look like a scientist?

I realize your next question is probably "how are you still alive, you are 150 years old???"  Yeah, I am pretty old, but that is not too significant anymore.  Scientists figured out how to extend the lifespan of people, the average person now lives to about 200 years old.  Again, I am no scientist, so do not bother asking how this happened.

Now that we have all that kind of crap out of the way, you probably want to know what has been happening in the world.  Well that is what I am here to tell you.

Politics
Things turned to shit in this country in the 2030s.  The economy sucked, the rest of the world surpassed us, we had serious problems.  It did not help that people were living to over 120 on average, yet the retirement was still 70.  Yeah, no one could figure out what the hell was wrong in the world.

Then the people elected Juan Rodriguez, our first Latino president (hey, in this entire time, we have still not had a woman president, haha, suck it feminists--just kidding).  He had radical ideas, one of them was raising the retirement age to 120.  He also decided to legalize marijuana and then tax the shit out of it.  He then decided to force Mexico to be part of the United States, divided it up into eight states.  Pretty much made the place a giant resort.  The rest of the place was used to cultivate weed (which was basically all they did down there to begin with).

All those fears about drugs ruining the country turned out to be false, people pretty much only smoked dope on special occasions.  Especially when the laws for other drugs became insane.  Caught with a little cocaine?  50 years in prison.  Tested positive for heroin?  Penal colony in Mexico.  People began studying and focusing more on becoming intelligent.  This became our greatest export:  knowledge.  Medical, computer, technological, whatever advancement you can think of pretty much happened here.

Technology
Speaking of tech, you are undoubtedly wondering what the world is like in the future.  It took me about ten minutes to remember how to type.  We do everything with our minds now.  So much easier.  I do have some bad news though, still no flying cars.  No land-speeders, none of that cool shit.  Cars are cool now and they use an alternative fuel source.  I cannot mention what though, it would blow your mind, I will give you a hint:  you put it in your coffee.

Sports
I do not want to spoil anything, but the Pirates eventually win the World Series.  I am not even kidding.  I will not say what year, but when they do win it, cherish the hell out of it.  You will not see another one.  Depressing, I know. 

The Steelers win a bunch of Super Bowls.  After Ben retires, they draft a QB who is 6'7, 280, runs a 4.1 40 and can throw the ball 90 yards (some people believe he may be the first genetically engineered athlete, we fans say stop being jealous).  The Pens also win a bunch of Stanley Cups, so you will always have those two to make you happy.

The Yankees sign the first player to a $1,000,000,000 contract.  He is a short-stop from Ireland and ends up breaking the HR record.  He hits over 900.  They win a shit ton of World Series with him, most consider it a good investment.

People in America still do not give a shit about soccer.

Random Stuff
-George R.R. Martin finally finishes A Song of Ice and Fire in 2056.  You were right, Jon is Rhaegar's son.  He and Daenarys rule the entire world.  Hope that does not ruin it for ya.

-Movie franchises start combining and become absolutely ridiculous, such as Fast and the Furious 21:  The Rise of the Raging Transformers.  Or Saw 87:  Jigsaw vs. James Bond. 

Oh and the most important thing is about your own future Josh:  You will end up
OH SHIT!  HERE COMES THE TIME-COP, I NEED TO RUN FOR IT!